Sunday, January 22, 2012

Get the Skinny

Cancer caused me to lose about 15 pounds I didn't really need to drop, through a phenomenon with the terribly nineteenth-century name wasting. Wasting occurs when tumors direct the body to eat its own muscle mass. It replaced my fairly fit, youngishly-middle-aged physique with that of a little old chicken-lady who lives on cigarettes and 3.2 beer and has never exercised a day in her life.

Luckily, chemotherapy and massive quantities of naturopath-prescribed fish oil have stabilized me at about size 4. I should enjoy it while it lasts: if you don't look too closely, you might mistake me for a cover girl, fashionably shorn and anorexic. To paraphrase the comedian Sarah Silverman, I don't care if you think I have cancer, as long as you think I'm thin.


  1. I should have known that all this was a ploy so you could be photographed with that, that, um, hunk-in-his-underwear.

    Did Rick volunteer and was rejected? Or did he reject your request? --snort--

    I think you are suave and elegant, myself. And I'm not a bit prejudiced.

  2. we actually thought that was rick. suzy and family

  3. I would probably be smiling if I were standing beside him...